It's late and I actually have to wake up to catch a ferry in 5 hours, but I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling wishing to sleep, but it just wasn't happening. I decided to be a little productive and write my first entry. I haven't even finished designing this blog, but I really just needed to write and get some things off my chest.
I named this blog "Uncharacterstically Robyn" mostly because uncharacteristically me was taken so I had to use my name, but I chose those words beside I don't believe that we ever really figure out exactly who we are. Maybe at the end of life, in those last few moments it all comes to together and makes sense, but as far as while moving through life I don't think many of us have a freaking clue who were truly are or what the hell we're doing.
Sure we all have a basic idea of what our personality is and we've gained a each of our individual "reputations" but every once in awhile we doing something that surprise ourselves, we shock ourselves or even shame ourselves. We do something that we never thought we'd ever do and we all have those moments for the good and the bad. These are big learning points for us, moments when we have to realize that we truly are capable of anything. These moments or periods in our lives can really get our brains thinking about who we really are and what our purpose is.
This is what I am going through at the moment. It's a real rough patch in my life and I'm not really big on talking about it, but I find that expressing myself through writing can help a bit, but that's another reason I started this blog. Kind of as a use of therapy. Often times I find myself writing posts in my head - this was before I even had a blog, so it was kinda strange, maybe they were more like mentally written diary entries - while lying in bed, because I suffer from chronic insomnia. I hate writing on paper and I always think that if I open my macbook that I'll never get any sleep, but tonight I risked it and started this damn blog to help me cope with my life.
This isn't a blog searching for the answers to be problems, it's really just a personal blog that brings up issues, good and bad, about life. Maybe just to get it out there or to help someone else know that they aren't alone, that they can relate to the same things that I'm dealing with.
Despite the rough patch of life that I am going through, I have a lot of awesome things in my life right now. I recently moved back home and in with my mom. Some people wouldn't be so excited to say that, but I love my mother and she's always been there for me, especially in the rough times.
I've also taken up the interest of living organically. I've ALWAYS wanted a farm, cause I'm a huge animal lover, but I understand that you have to kill things to eat. So when talk of getting pigs, meat chickens and laying hens came up, I ran with the idea. Plans and preparations will be starting soon, so I'll probably post about that every so often.
This is all happening now because of a major heat wave that's hit. Today (March 22) it was 30 degrees in some places on the island, this is completely insane for this time of year. It scares me because that means this summer is probably going to be scorching! For a fair skinned and heat stroke prone kind of girl, this isn't exciting.
I think this post has served it's purpose and I've started to feel like I could fall asleep. So night all of the followers I don't have!